Ontario Tower Buzzers? Team name gets stinging response

Thousands of people assembled in downtown Ontario on Thursday evening, many of them in Dodger gear, to celebrate the launch of the Dodger-affiliated minor league baseball team.

The video screens played footage of fighter pilots as a warmup. Then the team name was announced with verve from the Town Square stage: the Ontario Tower Buzzers.

I heard a couple of laughs, then some general applause. No roars of approval, though. The name seemed to fall flat. That was my sense.

The mascot, Maverick, was introduced. It’s a fuzzy yellow bee clad in a blue flight jacket and cap. For those who miss the reference, Maverick was Tom Cruise’s character in “Top Gun,” a pilot who buzzed a control tower.

(This was all news to me. I’ve never seen the movie, unlike whoever came up with the team branding.)

The bee is cute. Ontario Tower Buzzers, I dunno. It doesn’t roll off the tongue. In their remarks, officials just called them the Buzzers. That’s better but sounds uncomfortably like the Buzzards.

For what it’s worth, social media piled on quickly.

“Out of all the names, you thought this was the best one?” was the most popular comment an Ontario city Instagram account, with hundreds of likes. Another was: “You let your opponents pick out your name? There wasn’t one person under 50 on that marketing and naming committee and it shows.”

On the team’s Instagram, the most-liked comment as of Friday was: “stay tuned for a petition to rename,” followed by a broken heart emoji. Not a good sign. Another called the name “a half-hearted idea from a boardroom gone wrong.”

“Excited about the team; absolutely hate the name,” read another popular comment.

To be fair, hundreds of people were in line to buy, or at least examine, the team merchandise. I have to think the Rancho Cucamonga Quakes, and its dinosaur mascots, were greeted with skepticism or confusion by many locals — “why not the Rancho Cucamonga Grape Crushers?” — before becoming community fixtures.

Also, if the Los Angeles baseball team debuted today, would anyone think the Dodgers was an excellent name? What does it mean? Is it a dodgeball franchise?

So maybe the Tower Buzzers will grow on everyone.

I can’t see how. But it’s possible.

My own contest in this space for a team name was meant in fun, not as an effort to come up with good names. Yet after Tower Buzzers, it’s hard not to take a second look at some reader entries, especially the Aviators, the Turbulence, the Baggage Claims and the Layovers.

On my way out on foot along Euclid Avenue, two late arrivals asked me if the name had been announced. Ontario Tower Buzzers, I said, then repeated it when they looked blank.

“Posers?” the man asked, puzzled.

I mimed pushing a doorbell and repeated, “Buzzers.”

His response: “Oh.” Then they turned and continued on.

Can you feel the excitement, Ontario?

IE in magazines

The summer issue of Alta Journal, with a road trip theme, has a list of five California “road-trip food stops” in Auburn, San Jose, Bakersfield, La Mirada and Redlands.

Of the latter city’s Taco Tia, Farley Elliott writes: “Before Glen Bell founded Taco Bell, he created Taco Tia. A final, often-overlooked location remains, with a nostalgic menu of hard-shell tacos plus deliciously messy ‘taco burgers’ and breakfast burritos. Consider this a Taco Bell prototype.”

Meanwhile, in the fall issue of Westways, “5 Noteworthy SoCal Openings” includes Rancho Cucamonga’s Sanctity Hotel. It’s described as a 68-room retreat-inspired hotel with “the city’s only rooftop bar and restaurant,” its menu inspired by Durango, Mexico.

Rancho Cucamonga, city of surprises.

That’s rich

In his editor’s note in that Westways issue, Jim Benning jokes that he does his best to avoid travel-writing cliches such as “off the beaten path,” “land of contrasts” and the bane of his existence, “hidden gem.”

“Somehow, every village is a hidden gem. Every museum is a hidden gem,” Benning scoffs.

This reminds me of a local cliche I do my best never to use: “rich history.”

It cracks me up how often these words are paired locally. You almost never see “history” by itself. Nope. Every city, even ones founded during the 21st century, or that seemingly consist of little else but national chain restaurants, is said to have not only history, but a “rich history.”

In some cases this “rich history” must double as their town’s “best-kept secret” — another tired phrase I try to avoid.

Tourism (or not)

Mention was made here of being waited on at a St. Louis restaurant with my parents last July by a young man who, coincidentally enough, grew up in Riverside. I identified him as Owen Brown.

Brown later got in touch, excitedly, after a family friend in Chino Hills alerted him that his name had appeared in my column. Nice to know some folks still get a kick out of this sort of thing.

Brown was back here the other day for the first time in five years to attend a wedding and wanted to meet me.

Over coffee in Riverside, the Cal Baptist valedictorian told me he’d gone to St. Louis to attend seminary. He so much liked the city’s arts scene — it has, he says, 20 theater companies — and its community feeling that he decided to stay.

Instead of becoming a pastor, he founded a positive-focused theater company, Bread & Wine, where he writes, directs and performs, while waiting tables to earn a steady income.